Billy says my methods are questionable at best.

I thought that was a little harsh. Most of my repairs stay repaired until I leave.

But he said I should try ChatGPT. Apparently, you tell it what you’re working on, and it explains how to do the job properly.

Figured I’d give it a chance.

Old Mrs. Johnson had a loose towel bar in her bathroom. One loose screw. Five-minute job.

I brought the whole toolbox anyway. Looks better on the invoice.

I typed, “How do I fix a loose towel bar?”

ChatGPT said to gently tighten the screw.

I did.

Now it was spinning freely.

That’s usually how I know it’s tight enough.

I gave the bar a little tug to check.

Came right off.

I sent ChatGPT a picture.

“It appears the wall anchor has failed.”

Well, somebody had to take responsibility.

It suggested a larger anchor. Found one in the bottom of my toolbox. Didn’t have the screw it came with, but I had a longer one.

Longer is better. More house to grab.

Started driving it in.

Heard a hiss.

I stopped the drill.

Hiss kept going.

That ruled out the drill.

I asked ChatGPT, “Should there be water behind a towel bar?”

It said, “Stop immediately.”

Already had. I was on my phone.

Then it told me to locate the water shutoff.

I asked Old Mrs. Johnson where it was.

She said, “Why?”

I said, “Just getting familiar with the property.”

By then, the wall had started getting familiar with the water.

I wrapped a towel around the screw. Worked pretty well, actually.

Finally had somewhere to hang a towel.

ChatGPT said I needed to access the damaged pipe. I sent another photo and asked how much drywall to remove.

It said, “A small section.”

That’s helpful. I’ve got a small sledgehammer.

First swing made a tidy little opening.

Second swing connected it to the first.

Third swing gave me enough room to work comfortably from the hallway.

Old Mrs. Johnson came to the door.

“Why can I see the toilet?”

“Better airflow.”

She stood there for a minute. Then she went to make tea.

That’s experience. She knew we weren’t near the end.

I found the pipe. The screw had gone straight through it.

Beautifully centered, too. Couldn’t have done that if I’d measured.

I sent ChatGPT a close-up.

It said, “This repair may require a licensed plumber.”

I told it I already had somebody on site.

It asked if they were qualified.

Felt we were getting away from the towel bar.

I asked about tape.

It said tape wasn’t an appropriate permanent repair.

That’s fine. I was going to put drywall over it.

Used the tape.

The hiss stopped.

I stood back. Dry pipe. Quiet bathroom. We were recovering nicely.

Then the tape started swelling.

Just a little bubble.

Pressed it flat.

Came back.

Put another layer over it.

That settled it down.

ChatGPT said I should test the repair before closing the wall.

I’d been watching it the whole time. Nothing had happened for nearly eight seconds.

Passed.

Put the drywall back. Little filler. Little paint.

The wall had a bit of a belly to it, but the towel bar covered most of that.

This time I used longer screws on both ends.

Wasn’t making the same mistake twice.

Sent ChatGPT a picture of the finished job.

It said, “I can’t verify the plumbing repair from this image.”

Exactly. Seamless finish.

Packed up my tools, hung a fresh towel, and stood beside my work.

“See, Billy? Nothing wrong with getting a little expert advice.”

The wall made a noise.

I kept looking at the camera.

“Another satisfied customer.”

The towel bar shot across the bathroom.

Water blasted out of both holes.

“Anyway… follow me for more DUI’s… er, DIY’s.”